Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Day #47: New Sizes, Ups & Downs

Today I went to Far Away City for my LASIK follow up and bought new scrubs while I was there. I used to wear a 2X top and XL bottom and I am now an XL on top and L on bottom! I was so happy :-D!!!

I also saw one of my besties while I was there and the compliments made me feel really good! Today I also got a backhanded compliment that made me sad. Last month I wrote out a list of motivators, and one of them was this:

"Every time I start a "diet" my mother in law talks to me in this tone of voice that says "we'll see how long this lasts". She even one time said, well, let's see if you can stick with it. I will prove her wrong."

I was talking to my MIL today and I told her I went down in scrub sizes and she said "well I hope you can keep up with it this time because you'll definitely feel better". I just wanted to hang up and cry because she made me feel like she has no confidence in me. But I held it in and didn't let her know it bothered me.  I honestly don't think she is trying to be mean, but it just hurts.  I KNOW I can do this forever. I'm sure I will have weight fluctuations just like "normal" people do. I'm trying to have confidence in myself and ignore mean statements like this.

Speaking of "normal" people, during my drive today I thought about stopping and getting a "snack" for the trip. I rationalized with myself that "normal" people do this. I decided not to because I know I don't have a normal relationship with food. I'm glad I didn't end up stopping.

NSV's for today: new sizes and not stopping for road snacks!

4 comments:

  1. Congrats on reaching your goals! Maybe try to always leave the house with a banana and a big bottle of water then you never get put in that place again where you have to decide ( ;

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  2. Woo hoo..good for you. I understand about the comments, but I would just try to remember that you are never going to get from her the comments or tone that you deserve or need. She might be incapable of doing that because no one gave her the support she needed. Maybe that will help?

    I remember getting something nasty on my uniform at work one day--probably something from a NGT tube..andI had to go down to surgery to put on scrubs for the rest of my shift. Uh I barely fit in whatever their largest size 2xl? was..not a lot of fat doctors then. I always hated scrubs after that.

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  3. Whats a "Normal Person" and who cares what they are doing... What does the Happy,Healthy you do? Congrats on down sizing your clothes, and as far as negative comments let them be motivation don't let someone else determin what your path is.

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  4. Sometimes the people we love hurt us, intentionally or not, but we have to learn to rise above it and be proud of ourselves. Great job on moving down in size! I KNOW you are going to keep it up!

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